These Things Happen: Musings from a Self-Proclaimed Food Addict

Coming down off the keto diet and eating fruit again is like having been sent to the gates of heaven and showered with ambrosia, the nectar of the Gods. I made a protein shake with frozen berries that have antioxidants. Why had I put a moratorium on all fruit? Because they contain Satan sugar and daemon carbohydrates.

I put a half a banana in the shake with spinach and coconut and chia seeds and coconut milk. OMG, you guys. The flavor is like sweet, sweet nirvana exploding in my parched and neglected mouth.

Oh, Keto, you steered me right. and then wrong, and now I am finished with you and feel like a new person. However, I am aware that looking at carbs seems to be all it takes for me to gain back some of the weight I’ve lost. I’m slightly terrified. I’ve always thought I could save myself the trouble of having to eat my food if I could simply apply it straight to my hips and butt like lotion. 

While on Keto (but not for certain because of Keto), I’d begun experiencing steep dizziness. It was probably from a medication I take—but I’ve been putting that in my mouth for over two years now. Maybe the dizziness sprung from a combination of low carb or yo-yo keto attempts and medication. Maybe my body is living in some kind of purgatory—loves the food, hates the food—and I’ll be released to heaven or hell when I discover just the right balance.

Either way, getting of Keto and reintroducing good, whole foods has brought a cloud of euphoria down over me. I’m looking forward to food again.

I must be careful not to return to my old, mindless eating ways. No bingeing on Doritos, no cookie after cookie after cookie because it tastes amazing with my coffee before 9 am. I must continue to think about my health goals and what I want for my body and mind—I want those things more than cake. Usually. So, another journey begins…

I am seeing a dietician in March. I hope she will help me outline a plan of diet and exercise that is sustainable. My doctor said that because of my medication (pregablin) and because I’m post-menopausal (had to have a hysterectomy in 2014 due to debilitating endometriosis), It is going to be very challenging for me to lose weight and that if I were able to lose 20 more pounds it would be a miracle (my words). But his facial expression told me he was doubtful. Come on, Doc! Where’s the encouragement? I can do this!

2 thoughts on “These Things Happen: Musings from a Self-Proclaimed Food Addict

  1. I’ve been reading Intuitive Eating and also working through the Intuitive Eating workbook and I haven’t lost weight. (because that isn’t the goal), but I feel like I am gaining a much better understanding of how to have a healthy relationship with food. Good luc! I Hope you keep feeling better!


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